About the author

Hello
I suppose you’ve come to this page looking for answers, or information regarding the monsters you’ve been hearing about. Well you’ve come to the right place. Let me explain . . .

I’m Ruth Ashton, if i had to put a name to what I do it would be: Advanced Monster Discoverer, Researcher and Documenter.

Hello, I'm Ruth Ashton

Where it all began
I discovered my first monster whilst studying at university (more years ago than I really like to admit to now), the clock had long since rolled past midnight on one of those ‘all nighters’ where you try and cram six weeks of work into one.  The house was suffering the consequences of such a strenuous week, the remnants of meals were precariously balanced on top of piles of books and notes. And the poor bin had given up on overflowing, and had buried itself a rubbish mound that any landfill site would have been proud of. Needless to say, the possibility of rats was quite high. So when I first heard a scrabbling and thumping noise from the laundry cupboard, i wasn’t all too surprised (Disgusted, yes, and dreading the phone call to the landlord, but honestly not surprised). I decided at first to ignore it, there were after all, more pressing matters of looming deadlines to deal with. But the rustling continued, and grew, until it became a commotion. A commotion that soon reached an intolerable level. The cupboard door was then opened a crack and a sock forcefully thrown out with an expression of ‘bluhh’ and promptly closed again. I haven’t really had any dealings with rat infestations before, but I didn’t think this was normal. So I decided to investigate. I crept over to the cupboard (which was no mean feat giving the mess of the house), arming myself with a frying pan along the way. I waited there for my courage to catch me up (this took a while). In the meantime the rustling continued with additional sounds of ‘Ooo’s’ and ‘Aha’s’ just drifting out above the din. 

I decided on a plan of counting to three, then flinging the door open and switching the light on in one swift movement, hoping to startle whatever it was rummaging around in there. I got to two before the adrenaline kicked in and my arm opened the door of its own accord before my brain cottoned on to what was happening. Without light my eyes couldn’t quite keep up with what was going on either, but managed to catch up with the programme just in time to make out a large number of legs muttering ‘uh-oh’ and disappearing into the depths of the laundry wearing what looked suspiciously like my new socks. This was my first encounter with the sock stealing monster. If i hadn’t been so sleep deprived and caffeine fuelled i’d have thought i’d gone insane. Instead I was intrigued, and spent the next few evenings lying in wait eagerly observing this peculiar monster. (I also managed to meet the minimum requirements to hit the deadline - which still baffles me to this day).

For the rest of my university career i became obsessed with finding these monsters and documenting their individual quirks and behaviours. Needless to say this had an impact on my studying, and when I reached the end of my final year I had nothing to offer my tutors but my research, which I optimistically presented in a highly detailed illustrated  book, which documented these monsters in minute detail, including embroidered materials mimicking the texture of their skin. Fortunately I was doing an art and design based degree and the book was very well received. The book was subsequently named Monsters of the Household variety, a book which more people can relate to than i ever thought would.

The compiled book of monster research

Since that moment I have been reluctant to put anything down to sods law (unless the little sod is the monster in question, and he’s rudely creating his own laws in the usual haphazard way that is so commonly found in monsters), and more often then not, after a bit of looking (you have to know just how though), there’s a monster behind every little quirk and absurdity that life throws at us.

Finding where a monster has been, and what its been up to is really the easy part. The challenge comes when trying to lure a monster out of hiding. It’s a challenging and creative process, one in which you really find out what you’re made of.

Interesting things I’ve discovered whilst documenting monsters:

• I can go 36 hours without sleep, and still function relatively normally*. (*define normal)
• I can’t hang upside down for more than 30 minutes without it having a severe detrimental effect on my wellbeing
• For a person I bounce really well
• never ever ever leave chocolate unattended
• monsters cannot be filmed or photographed. It’s been an expensive learning process trust me.
• I have an impressively strong stomach when it comes to offensive smells
• i can whistle better by inhaling than exhaling